Finally Together

Finally Together

Help Us Bring Vitali Home

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Difficult Trials

This post is one of the most difficult to write.  It is hard to express our grateful appreciation for the help we have been receiving along with our disappointment of the recent news we’ve received.  First I will start with the good news. 

We were told that we would be traveling to Ukraine the end of this month and that we needed to have $13,500 in cash with us for various adoption needs.  At the point when we found out this news, we only had about $2,000 of that in our savings account set aside for the adoption.  My cousin Matt and his wife Tara decided to start a FaceBook page called $50 for Vitaliy.  The point of $50 for Vitaliy was to give one final push in the month of July to help us with our financial adoption goal.  At this point we have $3,748.80 and that is quite a big jump in only a week!  What we are most surprised about, and perhaps we shouldn’t be, is the fact that those who have the least are giving the most.  We have seen this repeatedly throughout this process.  We’ve had young families with meager means giving large amounts because they believe that acquiring wealth and things are not as important as eternal things such as giving an orphan a family. On the other hand, we know some who have much, find it nearly impossible to give even a small amount.  I debated on discussing this on our blog but it is interesting to see what people value most in life.  It isn’t about a few giving a large sum but a lot giving a small amount.  When I discussed what people might think about donating $50 with Tara.  She told me, “$50 is nothing, most families would just have to sacrifice going out to dinner a couple of nights in the month of July.” We are grateful for everything that people have sacrificed for our family, especially your prayers.

Now for the not so great news, as I mentioned before, we were told and planning on heading to Ukraine the end of July or beginning of August.  We were informed last week that we aren’t going to be able to travel that soon after all.  There are several factors, so I will try to make a long story short.  First of all, there are 12 other families besides ours that are in this final stage, ready to travel and finalize the adoption of our children.  The number of families that are going to overwhelm the existing assistance in place in Ukraine.  Also Ukraine is very similar to Italy in that August is vacation month.  Basically in August, Ukrainian families take their vacations, which means that government offices that are essential for adoption procedures will be sparsely manned.  We were told we could travel the beginning of September but Brandon’s job is unable to let us travel until the end of September.  Our new timeline is: we will travel around the last week of September for our required 23 day stay in Ukraine then come back for our 10 day wait then return to Ukraine for our final adoption the end of October or beginning of November.  We have not told Vitaliy yet about the delay and I am not sure how we will.  Please pray with us that he doesn’t lose hope, but that this will show him that God is his savior and not us.  


  1. oh so sorry!! praying and thinking of you guys! prayers for Vitaly for sure. just a little longer...let us know how we can help!

  2. Perhapa it's a sign from the lord - you illegally preselected a child to adopt from Ukraine. Who was illegally photolisted, since all photolistings are illegal in Ukraine. You chose to work with a ministry that knowingly breaks the law AND works with serge the allegedly corrupt Ukrainian facilitator that threatens adopting families and other facilitators. You cannot be bothered to to the responsible thing and save up the $$ to adopt, thus putting yourself in the position of being unable to care for this kid (caring includes covering all his financial needs). allegedly sent a letter to USCIS and u adoption authorities about you July 1!!

    God is so good! Always! But karmas a bitch... You break the law, try to purchase a child you won't spend your own money on bc lil vitali is not worth it to you... And god sends you delays as a sign!! Cuz god is always good to you!!

    1. While I respect that you have a grasp of some information I feel sad that you chose to judge these people without really having all the facts. If you do some research you will find that for the Ukraine there is an exception for pre-selection and photolisting in regards to children between the ages of 7-10 that became known to families through mission trips, hosting and other adoptive families. So you will find no broken laws in this case. I do understand where your confusion would be on a general basis but this is not a general case. While I am sure you read through the blog noting the family is working with the USCIS especially since they are a military family you will also be able to see that Vitali is coming close to the crucial bracket age point and the family cannot wait to earn every extra cent on their own. Not to speak of the strong bond, love and attachment this family already has for him that would not let anyone wait, knowing how long the process has been and how much they have done already.

      Knowing the family personally, I have NO doubt that they are in a posistion financially to provide him with every need. It is a testament to their character that so many chose to continue to help raise the funds in support of the legal adoption. Most of all this is the most kind and loving family I have ever seen ( and I work with families) and what they have to give is more than just material needs. They will give him love, support and so much more. I do hope it is not your opinion that only the very rich should adopt. As long as they have the ability to care for him completely it makes no sense not to have help raising the funds, it is something many adoptive families do and must do.

      Please Note: I don't expect you to read this and suddenly have a change of heart because of my logical reasoning. If you find fault in my reasoning I will gladly listen to it but please be kind in your words.

  3. @Suzee,

    First of all, I would like to point out that in ‘Merica today, we still consider individuals innocent until proven guilty. Nowhere was your references, statistics or comprehensive credible knowledge concerning this family or this adoption.

    1. You blew your credibility.

    2. Your inaccuracies were tactfully and kindly pointed out for all to read.

    3. Where in the Bible is karma mentioned? Last time I checked God was the sole creator of the universe...Karma is an invention of Hinduism. Many of the 'isms also employ that term. To associate it with the Bible makes me question your fundamental grasp of the Gospel.

    4. Human interpretation of God's will and His word is ALWAYS a no no. This is why in Acts 1, Christ commands His disciples to WAIT for the Father to baptise them in the Holy Spirit prior to being commanded 3 verses later to witness to "Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria and to the ends of the earth." The Holy Spirit was given for a reason.

    5. Have you ever heard the adage, "a house divided cannot stand?" All I see here is a dissenting party who does not have the best interest of anyone but self. Jesus also said to those so quick to judge, to "take the log out of their own eye, prior to plucking the speck out of someone elses."

    6. One last note, Christ was perceived as a law breaker by the Pharisees. Why? Man's law is never, ever more important than God's law. Man judges the outside, while God judges the heart. Just to drive this home, we live about 72 years on earth...while we will spend eternity in either one of two places. I think God's opinion of us is more important than any man.

    As C.S. Lewis once said..."There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, "alright then, have it your way."

    I would sincerely urge you to examine your own heart before God. The gospel is an amazing story that can change your entire life. C.S. Lewis tried to prove it as just another fanciful story, yet it gave his life a meaning so profound.

    Seek and you will find.


    1. Pilgrim's Progress repeatedly illustrates the walk being fraught with perils. I would highly encourage you to walk in grace, to seek first the kingdom of God and to not compare anything to other people. God's opinion and His standard are the only thing that matters. Don't let other people interfere with your relationship with Him.

    2. Job's friends did exactly this. Eventually Job gave in and questioned which point God came down pretty hard and gave a personalized reality check. Who made the rules? Who made the earth? Who made physics? Who made the adoption process? Who put Vitaliy on this earth? I have all faith that the adoption process will work, but that indeed it will be hard. Perhaps even harder as the time for completion nears.

    3. Job lost his children, all of them. He lost is worldly wealth, physical health and even the trust of his wife. Yet he did not deny or accuse God. Stay on the narrow path, fight the good fight. Bless those who curse you, love those who hate you. This is the Gospel. We hated Christ, yet He died for us. We lost ourselves from beginning of time-yet Christ found us and called us His Children, His elect. He left all the good 99 sheep to find that one, lonely lost lamb.

    4. God called you to do this, and he will provide the means (as He is currently doing). The method and way He so chooses to do so is sovereignly His choice, not ours to pick and choose.